A dildo is a phallic-shaped sex toy that can be used for vaginal or anal penetration. Unlike vibrators, dildos don’t typically have multiple settings or pulsing. They can be inserted for solo pleasure or shared with a partner.
It’s important to use a lubricant with a dildo, especially for anal play. It’s also helpful to start with foreplay, such as rubbing the clitoris or vaginal opening.
Vaginal Penetration
While it is a common sex toy for vaginal penetration, a vibrator can also be used for oral sex with a partner. Simply pump a little lube on the end of the toy and insert it into your mouth, and turn it on at the lowest setting. This adds an extra layer of sensation that can be a lot of fun, and it’s also great for tongue stimulation.
Using a vibrator for oral sex is also a great way to stimulate your G-spot if you don’t want to go through the process of penetrating your vagina or anus with a bullet vibrator. The trick to this is to choose a bullet toy that has a flared base or ring pull, so that it’s easy to remove. It’s important to remember to use a good amount of lube, especially if you’re new to this, and to test it out on a different body part first before making the big move.
Similarly, a wand-style vibrator is a great choice for clitoral stimulation. To do this, have your partner lie on their back and place the vibe against their labia and clitoris. The vibrations will be both intense and stimulating, and you can even increase the intensity by stroking it with your hands. It’s a good idea to use a silicone lube with this, but make sure it’s an organic water-based lube that will not damage the material.
Anal Penetration
If you’re trying anal penetration for the first time, or you’re just a bit nervous about using a vibrating toy in this area, start with something small. “For beginners, I suggest something that’s less than 1-inch wide at its thickest insertable point,” says Sloane. She recommends a toy from the Tantus Silk anal plug collection or a silicone butt plug, both of which are body-safe, easily sanitised and super flexible for comfort and ease of use.
Once you’ve gotten comfortable with the size of your anal sex toy, you can try toy extensions and add-ons that allow for deeper penetrations. However, don’t go for anything that isn’t 100% body-safe and that can’t be easily cleaned. Many items that were never meant to be inserted in the anal can cause irritation, and even lead to infection.
It’s a good idea to keep lube close, too. Just like the vagina, the anus region doesn’t self-lubricate, so lube is a must to reduce friction and enhance pleasure. “I recommend a water-based lube that’s gentle on the skin, such as a Wild Secrets anal lube,” adds Finn.
Once you’re comfortable, turn on your anal toy and enjoy your p-spot orgasm! It may take some trial and error to find a configuration that feels just right, but don’t give up. The rewards can be amazing!
Clitoral Stimulation
While it may sound silly to use a vibrator on your clitoris, many women enjoy the sensation. The first time you try this, take it slow and gently. Rather than directly stimulating your clit, use the toy to stimulate the hood of skin that covers it (called the clitoral hood) and then move it around your body.
Then, once you’re used to that, you can try stroking it with the length of the toy and then pressing it down against your clit. Afterward, you can also experiment with different speeds and areas inside your vagina to discover what feels best for you, Laino says.
You can also use a couple’s toy for clitoral stimulation by having your partner hold it in between your legs or on their shoulders while you lie on top of them, she adds. This position lets you lift your legs to a doggy-style position, which gives the toy a better angle for penetration while also putting more pressure on your clitoral hood and clitus. Then, have your partner move the toy back and forth with gentle pressure, which will give you more clitoral stimulation for some earth-shattering, neighbor-waking orgasms. It’s also important to remember to clean your toys regularly. Many sex toys come with a special cleaning kit, or you can buy sex toy cleaner from your local lube store.
Combination Stimulation
Getting a vibrator that can be used for multiple purposes is a great way to diversify your pleasure options. There are toys that mimic anal penetration, as well as ones that stay put (like a butt plug). “I recommend starting with something small, discreet and easy to use,” Fleming says. She recommends a bullet vibe, which can be used for clitoral and anal stimulation.
When using a vibrator with a partner, both of you can take turns stimulating each other’s clitoris and other erogenous areas like the nipples with the tip. This type of non-penetrative play can make orgasms more intense and can also help you discover pleasure points you didn’t know about before.
Before you get started, it’s a good idea to read the instructions that come with your new toy. They might have special tips and suggestions for how to use it as well as cleaning instructions.
The most important thing to remember when trying a vibrator is to be patient. It might take a while to figure out how much pressure and friction feels good, so don’t rush. And don’t forget to use lube. Without it, the experience can be painful and uncomfortable. Remember, too, that orgasm isn’t always the goal — sometimes just being able to use your erogenous muscles can be satisfying in and of itself.
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