Whether you’re gay or straight, bottoming can be an exciting and pleasurable experience. However, there are a few things to keep in mind before you try it for the first time.
Using lubrication can help ease the initial pain of penetration, and good communication between partners can help reduce discomfort. Lastly, if you plan to engage in anal sex, it’s important to get tested for STIs regularly.
Pain
Some people experience pain during anal sex, but it’s often mild. Using lubricants and poppers (slang for alkyl nitrites inhaled recreationally or for sexual arousal) can help reduce the pain. The anus has many nerves, making it sensitive. It’s also behind the prostate gland, which means it’s filled with blood vessels. These sensations can heighten the pleasure of penetration and lead to orgasms.
Penetration of the anus is a naughty feeling for many people and can feel intense and satisfying. The person doing the penetration, known as a “top,” usually uses their penis to anally penetrate a partner, but a dlido or other sex toy can be used. People of all sex orientations and genders enjoy anal play, but it’s particularly erotic for men.
The anus is especially delicate and can tear easily, which can leave more openings for STIs to enter the body. It’s also at a higher risk for HPV, a sexually transmitted disease that causes vaginal warts. Because of the risks, some people avoid anal sex altogether. However, that’s a personal decision and not one anyone should feel pressured to make. Regardless of whether you want to engage in anal sex or not, you should always use protection. If you’re at high risk for HIV, talk to your doctor about taking pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) to reduce your chances of getting an STI.
Pleasure
A dense concentration of nerves lines the anus, and when a penis is inserted anal-style, it can give a penetrator an incredible sensation. Many gay men report that anal sex feels much more intense and longer-lasting than vaginal sex.
Some people may experience pain during anal sex, particularly if it’s their first time bottoming. The pain is typically caused by hemorrhoids — a collection of abnormally dilated veins in the rectum. Hemorrhoids are a common condition, especially in the US, and can be aggravated by low-fiber diets. The best way to prevent anal-related pain is to practice good hygiene and avoid constipation, which can cause hard stools that put pressure on the rectum.
Most MSM who engage in anal sex prefer being the insertive partner, and are colloquially known as tops. However, some MSM enjoy a versatile sex role and are both active and passive during sexual intercourse.
Those who like to be the bottom, on the other hand, are known as bottoms. Although some men are uncomfortable with the idea of being penetrated in this manner, anal sex can be a wonderful pleasure for the right person. As long as the sex is conducted in a safe and consensual manner, it’s important to let your partner know what turns you on so they can accommodate your preferences.
Emotions
For some, bottoming can be an enormous source of pleasure. It can help enact deep-held fantasies and is often the beginning of more intense sexual experiences. For others, however, it’s a no-go, either because of pain or because they prefer other kinds of penetration.
It’s important for anyone exploring anal sex to take the time to prepare. Start with lube and a comfortable position. It’s also important to talk openly with your partner and if you feel uncomfortable, speak up! It’s also a good idea to practice on toys before trying anal sex with your partner. Some people find it helpful to use their fingers or a tongue while others may enjoy using dildos and butt plugs.
The prostate is a walnut-sized gland that produces ejaculatory fluid to protect and nourish sperm. It’s very sensitive and can be stimulated by many different objects. The prostate can produce incredible feelings of pleasure and even orgasms, but it’s important to be aware that the pain and pressure can be too much for some people.
Whether someone is gay, bisexual or straight, it’s never safe to assume anything about their sexual preferences. There are gay men who don’t like or want anal sex, just as there are heterosexuals who do. It’s important for everyone to explore anal sex in a safe and responsible way, and to make sure they’re educated about the risks of STIs, including HIV.
Safety
Anal sex can feel great and safe, but it is important to use a barrier. Unprotected anal sex, including oral anal sex, carries a high risk of HIV transmission and other sexually transmitted infections. Using a condom (make sure it fits) with plenty of water-based lubricant is best. It is also a good idea to massage the anus with lube before penetration to help relax the internal anal sphincter.
It is important to be open and honest with your partner about what you are feeling. There are many websites with tips and guides to help a first time bottom have a good experience and orgasm. It is also a good idea to practice with a friend until you are comfortable with the feeling of your own anus.
There are also some sex toys designed to be used for anal stimulation, but it is important that you do not insert a toy in your own anus. This can cause serious damage and lead to an infection. It is also a good idea not to use vaseline or other oil-based products for anal sex, as this can degrade latex condoms. If you do experience pain or blood after anal sex, you should see a doctor immediately. This is likely due to the skin being torn, but a doctor can check for other causes of bleeding or infection and recommend treatment.
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