Over the course of any marriage or long term relationship sex frequency will naturally fluctuate. However, if the changes are extreme and long term it may be time to seek help from an expert relationship counsellor.
It can be a difficult topic to bring up, but it is important to address the issue openly and without blame. I have compiled some of the more common reasons why do married couples stop having sex:
1. Loss of Passion
When couples don’t have sex as often, they may miss the intimacy and closeness of the other forms of affection in their marriage. Some of these other forms of intimacy include deep conversation, touching and kissing.
There are many reasons why a married couple’s sexual desire may drop. Some are short term and influenced by life events like children, work or health issues. Some are permanent and can be related to the aging process or even the death of a loved one.
Some people might say that if a couple has sex less than nine times per year, they are a “low-sex” or “sexless” marriage. However, experts who specialize in human sexuality disagree on how frequently a sex life should be measured. If a marriage or primary relationship is struggling to meet its sexual needs, it is important for the couple to have open conversations and seek professional help if needed. A sex therapist can help couples understand what’s contributing to their lack of interest and develop strategies for re-igniting the spark. The sex therapist can also provide advice and guidance on other forms of intimacy besides sex.
2. Health Issues
Many couples go through a period where they stop having sex as often as they used to. This can happen due to health issues, mismatched libidos, or a decline in desire with age.
If a couple doesn’t have as much physical intimacy as they once did, they may feel like roommates instead of intimate partners. It’s important for these couples to talk about their feelings in a safe space with a therapist or marriage counselor who can help them resolve the issue.
Some health issues can affect a person’s libido, such as depression or chronic health conditions that cause joint pain or other discomforts. Additionally, some medications can cause a decrease in sexual drive. If one partner has a health problem that interferes with their ability to perform sexually, it can cause friction and emotional distress in the relationship. However, these problems can be resolved with a few key steps. For example, some couples may decide to get more adventurous in the bedroom by using toys and penetration to increase interest. Others might choose to seek outside help, such as marriage counseling or joining a support group.
3. Busy Schedules
For many couples, busy schedules can make it hard to find time for sex. Whether one or both partners are working overtime, traveling for work, or running a successful business, they may be too exhausted to make it into the bedroom. This type of stress can lead to resentment in the relationship and eventually, to sexless marriages.
Many medical conditions and medications can affect sexual desire. If you and your partner are struggling to have sex, it’s important to talk to your doctor about what could be causing the problem.
If you haven’t seen each other for weeks or even months, you probably need to spend more time reconnecting emotionally. This can help restore sexual intimacy and may bring back your desire for sex as well. Having a busy life can certainly be a reason to have less sex, but the key is open communication with your partner. The right approach can help you find the balance between your work and your sex life. It is also important to remember that not all sex needs to be physical, and that sexual intimacy can take many forms.
4. Privacy Issues
Sex can be a sensitive topic for couples, especially if they’re struggling to communicate well about other topics. Couples need to be able to talk about their wants and needs, including sex. But, many couples struggle to bring up this topic and instead avoid it or hide their secrets. This can lead to sexual distance, which can have a negative impact on the relationship.
Sex is a big part of the intimacy in a marriage, but it is not the only way to show your love and appreciation for your spouse. Verbal communication is also essential. It can help to ease tension, resolve conflicts, and prevent resentment.
If you and your partner stop having sex, it’s important to understand why this happens. It can be difficult to talk about these issues, but it’s vital to the health of your relationship. If you’re struggling to find a good time to discuss these issues, consider seeing a couples therapist for guidance. They can help you work through the challenges and create a plan for moving forward.
5. Relationship Issues
There are times when sex in a marriage is not as important as it used to be for one or both partners. It’s a common occurrence that can happen over the course of many years. In some cases, the lack of sex is due to life changes like children coming along, work stress, health issues or even just aging.
While short term changes in sex are normal, if a couple is consistently going longer periods of time without having sex or having less sex than before, it might be a sign that their relationship needs to be examined and perhaps reworked. Expert relationship counselors can help by guiding the conversation in ways that are open and respectful, without blame.
Oftentimes, people seek professional relationship counseling when they are concerned about the frequency of their sex lives. It can be an uncomfortable topic to discuss, especially if the lack of intimacy is due to something that both partners aren’t happy with. However, addressing the issue in a healthy way can lead to sexual resurgence and renewed connection between couples.
See Also:
